Paris Hilton Watch

Access Hollywood is reporting that Paris is to be arraigned today for driving drunk.

Paris Hilton is to be arraigned in Los Angeles today on drunk driving charges. She is not required to appear in court because the charges are misdemeanors.

Hilton was pulled over last September seventh for driving erratically.

She reportedly told officers that she had had one drink on an empty stomach. She was on her way to get a burger when she was stopped. Hilton said she hadn’t eaten all day because she was filming a music video.

The hotel heiress and socialite has no prior DUI arrests. If convicted, she could be sentenced to six months in jail and fined one-thousand dollars.

The minimum penalty for a first-time offender is a fine, probation and rehab.

Perhaps rehab should be extended. Until she’s ninety and they take her license away for being old. And blind. And still stinking drunk.

And it’s not even in a black and white with night vision! Recently cast in The Hottie and The Nottie, Paris plays “the hottie.” I have a feeling it would be different if it was spelled The Hottie and The Naughty. See what I did there. Literary GENIUS. Hey at least I know how to read.

The plot is summed up in one line: A girl refuses to marry her longtime boyfriend until he can find the perfect match for her ugly best friend.

Wow. Compelling.

I can’t show you the pictures here, but X17 has some great pictures of Ms. Hilton ripping open her pants while bending over. Didn’t she want to play Jessica Simpson on SNL “because she’s fat and that would be funny?” Look who’s laughing now, Skeletor.

X-17 reports asking Paris Hilton, “Paris, You Want to Send Any Good Wishes to Lindsay?” Answer: “NO!”

I suppose the bad blood between the two will continue. Not that anybody cares what those two methheads are fighting about. Speculation on my part includes a dark-green video and pantloads of diet pills and Ex-Lax. Oh wait, that was the sex tape. I don’t really have a clue.

Paris told Hello magazine:

“I’m serious about acting and I have a bunch of movies lined up. I think I can become a good actress,” Hilton explained. “It’s something I want to prove to myself and to other people. I feel I’m getting better and feeling more confident about what I can do as an actress.”

If Paris thinks reading The Power of an Actor and taking a few acting classes is serious, I think she ought to also sign up for dog-walking and call herself a vet. She can start with Nicole and work her way up to bigger dogs, like maybe Rosie O’Donnell.

Paris isn’t required to show up, but she is being arraigned in LA today on drunk driving charges after being stopped in September.

Paris was on her way to get food after having “one drink” on an empty stomach, she stated that she hadn’t eaten anything that day.

Paris will likely be given probation, rehab and a fine, though she could face up to 6 months in jail.

Paris Hilton was recently at PURE nightclub recently and was kind enough to sing a track from her album, however, apparently someone in the audience wasn’t so pleased with Paris’s… um… singing. Instead of heckling a bad performance, this person threw an ice cube at her. And made his mark. The wonderful image is provided by spyonvegas.com.

Do you think this will make her think twice before releasing a second album?

Source

Well now you can be lucky enough to use Paris Hilton paper. Amazingly (to me at least) there are people willing to pay $11.00 (after shipping and handling) to get thier tp off of ebay. Hotel heiress Paris Hilton seems to be everywhere. With today’s eBay auction, she can be very near to you too. On your toilet paper.

Paris Hilton is to become the spokesperson for FILA in the companies South Korean market. Filming for the TV ads will be in January and they will be released in March. My only question is when was the last time Paris wore sneakers and wasn’t wearing couture?

According to Fred Khalilian, the owner of “Club Paris”, Paris Hilton (for which the club was named) Paris has, “created a circus for herself. It’s all about, ‘How has she screwed up now?’�?

Paris has been lending her name and endorsements to Khalilian’s clubs since 2005 and is required to make scheduled appearances at his various clubs. Evidently, Paris has pulled a no-show for two appearances in Orlando an Jacksonville (both in Florida) and even showed up 6 hours late to the opening of Khalilian’s Orlando club. Paris’s excuse for her delay? “I was in the Swiss Alps skiing, and I got caught at the airport with all the holiday travel so I’ve been trying to travel for the past 24 hours. I’m so sorry I’m late.

The club does not plan to change their name and will use the Paris, France as their theme.

Some are saying that Paris’s Louis Vuitton bikini is about as real as her tan…

Vuitton reps were quick to settle the rumors stating that the same bikini in pink sold out in Australia, she stated, “I haven’t seem the white one, but being who she is there’s little chance this isn’t an original.”.

What are your thoughts? Real or Fake?

During Paris Hilton’s media-frenzied trip to Australia, the blond was quoted as saying, “I have a lot of new year’s resolutions, One is definitely giving back, I’m really fortunate and that’s why everywhere I go I’m going to visit a children’s hospital, just get really involved in charity work.”

To further photo-op her photo-op, Paris dropped into the children’s ward of Sydney’s Royal North Shore Hospital to visit with the children, sign autographs and pose for pictures… rumor has it she may have made a few young gentlemen blush just a bit.

Paris Hilton was in Sydney on New Years Day to promote Australia’s new beer, Bondi Blonde.

Paris was reportedly paid millions of dollars to go on a 6 day promotional extravaganza to promote the new beer released by Bluetongue Brewery. Paris and Koby Abberton, a well known surfer, were on hand to choose the “Bondi Blonde” from among many bikini bearing dames, finally naming Jamie Wright as Ms. Bondi Blonde. Paris was kind enough to pose for pictures wiht Abberton after the crowning. Paris said, “Thanks for having me here, I’m having the best time and I love Australia, everyone’s been so warm and welcoming.” She said, “Being a blonde myself I love blondes, so I’m excited to meet you girls and thanks for having me here.”

Paris and Ms. Bondi Blonde, Jamie Wright

Poor-Little-Rich-Girl Paris Hilton spent New Years Eve in Sydney Australia, where she spent Eve-day enjoying a lovely lunch and a not-unusual blow-out of her checkbook shopping. Somehow in the confusion of spending a reported $2,750 on mere accessories (to include a U-bra for plunging necklines) at Arianne Lingerie, she managed to not pay for her hamburger, water and frappuccino at the local Sloanes Cafe. Her waitress, Jo Pfahl stated, “She’s got bucketloads of money and she didn’t pay for her drinks. (Paris) had a little chat with a waiter up front, then they all got up and walked out without paying.”

I think the most shocking part of this story is the fact that Paris EATS!

Not sure if these are authentic, but I’m pretty sure that Paris’ brain has not developed since these were written. They basically all say the same thing, “I can’t believe all these feelings are true and this is forever I love you so much you are my everything and I don’t know what I would do without you.”

It’s a damn good thing Paris does not write for Hallmark. Her current job suits her much better. Wait. What does she do?

All the handwriting looks similar and they seem to be real. The only thing that really surprised me is that she didn’t dot her eyes with little hearts. Now excuse me while I purge my soul of all this stupid.

Merry Christmas! I’ll be back January 7th, 2007!